One of the things I have been thinking about quite a bit is my role with Champion and exactly what it is. I know that sounds a bit strange since obviously I am his mom, but since we learned about his diagnosis, I have added advocate, therapist, nurse, appointment scheduler and paper work filler outer, to name a few, to my role as mom. I find that I have often done a pretty good job of staying on top of the above mentioned aspects of my role with him, but I’m not really sure I have taken the time out to just be “Mom”.
In the back of my mind I am always thinking how an activity can be turned into a therapy, what skill it will enhance for him. Every activity is carefully planned as to not disrupt his feeding schedule, his sleep schedule, to allow optimal time and energy to devote to working on milestones. And those things are important but…my role with him is more than that.
Lately I find myself just wanting to be with him, to get to know who he is, to spend time with him without a specific agenda, without a specific goal in mind. I want to enjoy building a bond with him. To let loose and not focus so much on everything always having to be therapy in some way or another. To allow my time with him to just flow. To say who cares if he wants to knock the letters on the ground and laugh instead of working on his fine motor skills by picking them up and releasing them into the bucket.
I want to take care of his needs, but also be able to throw the hidden purposes out the window, and just enjoy him as my son. I think he really needs that from me and I think I really need that too.
So…yesterday we just swam. And had a blast!
I put aside the excuses that he was too tired, he hadn’t slept good the night before, his feeding schedule would be off, we wouldn’t be able to do his after nap therapy routine, I don’t have the energy to,etc and just swam. And had so much fun.
First though we had to get prepared.
I had always resisted swimming in the past out of fear. Early on a Dr. had told me that Champion could get poisoned from too much chlorinated water getting in him through the sides of his g tube opening. So I just didn’t take him swimming.
But then I talked to other moms who took their kids who were g tube fed swimming all the time and they said they just covered it with tegaderm and plastic wrap and didn’t have any problems. (Love learning from other moms.) So we got him all wrapped up.
Now he’s all ready to go.
At first he wasn’t to thrilled.
So cousin got in and tried to show him how much fun playing in the water could be.
Then she got distracted and tried to get his glasses.
Eventually he relaxed and started liking the water. (So I know this was just a fun time, but I couldn’t resist thinking how free his movements were in the water.) Here he is kicking his legs.
Back to the fun. We spun in a tube. (Not too much though, my ability to handle spinning has greatly decreased with age.) Champion really enjoyed the spinning!
Here he is just “chillin”.
Then we tried a slightly warmed hot tub. He wasn’t too sure about the jets and bubbles at first.
But he got used to it.
All in all I think swimming was a hit. For him and for me.
So moving forward I am definitely going to be making an effort to put more focus on my “Mom” hat and figure out what that looks like in the midst of the other roles.
I would love to learn from you! How do you balance the “other” roles you find yourself in with your role as Mom?
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Shell says
Looks like he had fun- just playing!
Champion's Mommy says
Yes he did!
Adrienne says
I loved his smile in these pics. He went from being unsure to having a blast! Great job, mama. 🙂 Stopping by from Shell’s place.
Champion's Mommy says
Thank you! He was really not having it at first… but once he got going he loved it! Thanks so much for stopping by!
Kerri says
I will never forget one day being so overwhelmed during Boo’s speech therapy. I remember her SPT telling me to let her be the therapist and me be the mommy.
Best advice I was ever given!
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Champion's Mommy says
I love that advice from the SPT! It can be so overwhelming with all the therapies and trying to implement it all at home to. Sounds like you have (had) a really understanding SPT.
abbie says
I am like you…with all the medical testing we’ve been through…it is so hard to see past it all to the love, humanity and child’s play in all of us. We are lucky we did since after surgery and a premie we decided at long last to have a third…(easy baby is what we call him.)
I breath, pray, and take moments for myself to clear my mind in silence are the things I do to refocus on the simple living we miss a lot. Our world pushes us to schedule, fill out forms and keep track of it all. The Lord urges us to slow down, feel, seek, and revel. 🙂 It looks like you are doing a lot of the latter. It must feel wonderful.
Champion's Mommy says
Yes silence is so needed for refreshing! It is such a fight this day and age to slow down, feel, seek and revel. However when we do the benefits are so great, and you are so right, that is exactly what the Lord wants us to do! I am so glad you all decided to go ahead and have a third despite the previous challenges. That is encouraging for me to hear.
Stephanie says
I often have to remember to be “mom” as well. Thanks for the reminder!